i'm officially a physio!

although i haven't registered or anything...

i hope you're happy, having this new found toy. you thought no one wanted it back, didn't you?

well, i wanted it back. you don't know how much an inanimate object can be the cause of so much grief.

i know it is wrong. and i know i shouldn't do it.

i hope the same thing happens to you and your inanimate objects causes you LOTS more grief that it did me.

health kick 101

on the 20th of november, six of us decided to start our health kick, which involves no junk food for a month.

today is day six.

so far, i've been tempted with lollies, pizza, chocolate, my own birthday cake (which by the way, i haven't and ANY) fried spring rolls and krispy kremes. i can't say it's been extremely difficult but i do miss eating those foods. i'm the type of person that likes to snack a lot and it's been hard to find something 'healthy' to snack on in and around the house. it's even worse at my parents'.

so far, i haven't needed to call anyone for support. and i don't see myself doing it in the future. i'm not that big on food. that said, i do enjoy a good meal.

anyone else wanting to join is more than welcome. After all, isn't our body the temple for the Holy Spirit? (1 corinthians 6.19)

no more maroon

no more overdrive

enter the white bombshell.

crash

so i was in my first accident yesterday. mine was the middle car in a three car collision. I narrowly missed the first car only to be pushed into its rear by the car behind me. so much for braking on time.

things i got out of it:

1. i can continue to shake even hours after the accident

2. driving behind a car whose brake lights do not work is a very bad idea. change lanes immediately even if it means you have to do a uie to make your right turn.

3. having a headache all of the next day is no fun. no fun at all. neither is a funny neck.

4. when talking to mum on the phone, never neglect to say it was a MINOR accident or you'll scare the living daylights out of her. do not neglect a concerned dad either.

5. walking into a police station is not as bad as it seems to be.

how funny

i had my clinical exam today and the client thought that my examiners were students and asked them if they were learning anything from me. from me!

one down, five to go...

today...

the last ever day i said:

'hi, i'm deb, a physio student.'

so exhilarating.

my life in passing

random

this morning, stranger offered me a lift to the station.

i didn't know they still do that nowadays. she really made my day because i just missed my bus and was going to be late for clinics.

and to top everything off, she was a christian from korea!

//

WOW!!

R.I.P. Perry

'twas no better car
than perry of krista
our best memories by far
we'll miss ya.

just

a day in warnambool, a couple of parties and long drives. what a way to spend last weekend.

a late, but early start saw us on the road with the sun shining down on my side of the car. a pack of chips and a pack lollies sustained us as julie and i quietly but surely had conversations with the two girls i just met.

a quick toilet stop saw us to the doorstep of luke and bec's engagement party, just late enough to be fashionable. a few hours there, with the sun high in the sky and a light breeze was heavenly! that is until i stuffed myself silly with dessert and realised i should have left some room for the dinner that night.

we stayed in the bridesmaid's place in the middle of the city. it was all so quaint with the immaculate garden, neatly decorated house and a beautiful front porch with small disco balls hanging from the ceiling.

then there was the thing where the grandma dropped her daks to show me her newly operated knee. julie could hardly hide her horror.

not long after that, it was dinner which was just a short walk away from the house. my meal looked really small, but the blueberry sauce was very filling, as was the duck. i thought i would have to order something else. i ended up just as stuffed as i was from lunch.

BUT the four hours in the car each way did something to me. no, it's not whatever you think it was. i have a really sore back from all the sitting and it's not good.

//

the flowers are in bloom in my front yard. i have a tree that blooms both pink and white cherry blossom lookalikes.

apparently the previous previous owner (or maybe it was the previous previous previous owner?) grafted another tree that produced the pink flowers to the one that produced white flowers.

prettyprettypretty

//

last night, i had the opportunity to ride in a bicycle taxi/taxicycle (i made its name up) with chucky to a party. it wasn't cheap but it was one of those things you try once and never again unless you're with tourist that just has to try one of these.

the funny thing was, at the same time as we pulled up to the venue, two friends were wondering up from the opposite direction and remarked to themselves that it would be kind of embarrassing for the people to rock up to a party in, basically, a tricycle and run the risk of it being stolen. then we stepped out.

how embarassing...

//

the back still hurts.

one thousand steps

this morning, i attempted the climb the 1000 steps(kokoda trail simulation). it was incredibly uphill and hard. i had so many rests in between!

but it was so satisfying. once you reach the top of the steps, you'll think 'i've done it!' (although there's more of a hike up to the top of the mountain). then you slowly make the descent only to find that you're not so stable on your feet anymore.

surprisingly, i'm not tired. not at all.

//

i should really exercise more regularly...

i wake and feel the fell of dark, not day

i wake and feel the fell of dark, not day.
what hours, o what black hours we have spent
this night! what sights you heart, saw; ways you went!
and more must, in yet longer lights delay.
with witness i speak this. but where i say
hours i mean years, mean life. and my lament
is cries countless, cries like dead letters sent
to dearest him who lives alas! away.

i am gall, i am heartburn. God's most deep decree
bitter would have me taste: my taste was me
bones built in me, flesh filled, blood brimmed the curse
selfyeast of spirit a dull dough sours. i see
the lost are like this, and their scourge to be
as i am mine, their sweating selves; but worse.

- gerard manley hopkins

red, white and an icecream tub

i have finally finished my where's wally scarf.

now, all i need is the red and white striped beanie, a red and white striped long sleeved top and the blue pants.

facebook

so i've finally joined. after so long of resisting it, you know what made me do it?

my cousin refusing to send me her graduation photos which were on facebook.

the towel that has a cause

today is the last day i'll be doing research.

i make it sound so sad.

today is the LAST day i'll be doing reseach! yay!

no more writing of research papers and having numerous references i only cite once. no more staring at the computer for six hours of the day copying and pasting data from one software to another. no more looking at graphs and figures and wondering if i should delete one test because it's so variable. no more statistics; means and standard deviations i can handle buy doing t-tests, anovas and variences? throw me out the window. please.

i'm going home to enjoy my freedom for the next two weeks; watch some movies, play sims 2 on my psp and knit a new scarf.

amazing because it is

//the first chance i get to be a firstaider, i was a tad too far away from the action. a lady fainted on the train with a loud thud. i was half asleep and had no idea what was happening//i saw a group of eight young people wearing the same creamcoloured caps. i wonder if they were on a corporate company sponsored school excursion to conquer vic market for the glory of the corporate world//i spied for two seconds so i could see a redhead guy carrying an instrument walk to class. i didn't see him//my supervisor is away for the next five weeks so i might not get to fill out some forms to pass this subject with her//



//i'm addicted i'm needy i'm lost without you i need you amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me i once was lost but now i'm found was blind but now i see//

- the almost

happy birthday, dad & dan!

//

happy twentyfirst birthday, dear brother mine
i thank God, you turned out so fine
all the best in your aims in cricket
in life, i hope you'll never sit on the picket

happy fiftyfifth, daddy dearest
at being our dad, you certainly are the best
but with the silly jokes, would you please stop
because mum's almost chasing you with the mop

//

you know, i've stopped thinking about you until you started to talk to me again. i forget how much i was enamoured by you, your eyes, your voice. you've got my heart racing again. the pupils dilating, the whole works. but i do enjoy talking to you. you come up with the most interesting topics. i am afraid that i'll fall back to those days; especially with where i am now.

but i'm glad i know where we stand. it helps a lot.

it really does.

fantastic four: rise of the silver surfer

this film is one you should wait for the release on dvd. save your money for another movie. like watching transformers for the second time.

ff2 did capture a lot of the playful squabbles between the characters as in the comics, especially between johnny storm and ben grimm. switching powers was also a nice touch.

however, it borders on mediocrity despite the amount of money spent making the silver surfer look as silvery as he did. the storyline was painfully predictable and the plot lacked twists and turns.

actually, i take back the dvd thing. wait till it comes out on free to air television.

more than meets the eye

only a child of the eighties (and the little kids it's made for) will enjoy this. i vividly remember the pink energy cubes that the decepticons had to cut and cart around. and they always seem to be stolen; either from each other or some other place. the film...ohh. i had a silly grin plastered on my face for the entire one hundred and fourtyfour minutes. and for a long time after.

what more could you want when a movie starts off with action scenes, realistic-looking cgi, lots of explosions, consistent action sequences and impulsive robots from outerspace? however, with a film of this magnitude, there is no avoiding the cheesy insertion of that infamous phrase. but that's not the only thing that was cringeworthy. there are too many closeups that can cause problems with the flow of your vision and you can lose your bearings. but it was just for a moment and you're slammed back into the action.

one thing i was hanging out for was the noises that they make when they were transforming. i'm not sure whether it's the lack of it or the noise of the action masking it but i didn't hear much of it.

and bumblebee...ooh, how my heart jumped when he took the form of the new camaro...

i'm sure this will amuse some people to no end

last night, i witness a fight.

well, kind of.

okay, it was more of the aftermath of a fight that broke out in my carriage when i was taking the train home from a night out with some mates. i could have witness the fight if i hadn't been so oblivious to everything with my headphones in. sure i did hear a lot of noise, but when i finally turned around (it all happened behind me) i saw three men pinning a (drunk) guy onto a wall and telling him to stop swearing. he had a bloody nose.

apparently this drunk guy was swearing too much using the f & c words and some men were standing by the honour of the women on the train and asked him politely to stop. when he didn't, everything eventually got violent as the drunk guy tried to take a swing (but missed, obviously) at one of the other men and he ended up with a bloody nose.

part of me was kind of scared because it all happened barely five metres away from me but it wasn't for long because three security people turned up. hats of the the two men who broke the fight up first and thankfully, did not get hurt in the process.

deathbed

what have i done?

//

Jesus please forgive me of my crimes
sanctify this withered heart of mine
stay with me until my life is through
and on that day, please take me home with you

- relient k

today...

... a nine/ten yearold boy tried to pick me up for his nine/ten yearold friend and marry me off. and he used lewd words to achieve his aim. his friend was turning bright red with embarrassment and was trying to turn away. i was speechless. a passenger sitting on the other side of the train was trying hard not to burst out laugh. loudly. only on a train in the western suburbs.

... i found out that one of my family friends has stage 2 ovarian cancer. she's living in thailand at the moment and will probably come back for treatment. i don't know her very well, but she made sure i was well taken care of when i was travelling alone in bangkok. please pray.

celebrity blogger

"knowing a blogger in real life (you for example) is like knowing a celebrity" - k

really? wow. so i'm a celebrity to the six people that read this (there are only six regular people who leave comments. the others are all stalkers).

thanks for making me a star.

random thoughts

//i am envious of some people's lives but it is so much more than what they put on their blogs//i would like to go out with a twin//i just realised that it has been below 10 degrees for the past week and i've been wearing the same amount of clothes i wore last winter. no wonder it's so cold//i would like three of my future children to be boys. one. after. the. other//i've never really truly realised how far i've fallen until i read entries by a man with a fiery passion for the things of God and how he's working in his life//today, i found myself eating the button of my jacket after i woke up from a nap on the train. twice//singing moderately loudly at the busstop at 6am is kind of fun//i should really start learning to propel myself on my skateboard instead of standing on it like a statue carved out of ice during an earthquake//i can't believe i survived on four hours of sleep last thursdayfriday//God is good.

sex

she couldn't have been more than thirteen. fourteen at the most. her hair was tied back and braided with multicoloured hair ties. she wore an army print puffed jacket with faux fur lining its hood. her threequarter jeans sat low on her hips, only held up by a tan coloured belt with metal holes. worn pink shoes adorned her feet. her laces were dirty and untied.

there was an air of haughtiness around her. but her young face betrayed far more than her age. worrisome eyes hid behind a forced smile. she slouched like an eightyyearold with back deformities.

amongst talk of teenage pregnancies, her unseen friend asked, "so, what if you choose not to have any sex?"

to which she replied (after a long pause), "then i wouldn't have any friends".

//

how sad it is to hear things like this coming out of girls far from adulthood. society deems this generation to be mature than the last, able to cope with what life brings at an earlier age. but who are they kidding? who's on the loosing end here?

what will she teach her daughters when she does has them?

choose

let all of my dreams be found in you
let all of my longings be filled by you

- gravitate

girl

she stared
with eyes unwavering
her pupils widened and narrowed
with alternating streams of sunlight and shadows

what she saw, i can only wonder
oh, the infinite possibilities
what held her attention
of the object in question?

if only she knew what lies ahead
if only she knew how
she would be accosted
with secrets not worth keeping

16.06.07

shrek the third

sometimes, the first is always the best. this movie is just passable for a medium of entertainment. it was unusually short and predictable. don't get me wrong, i did like it. kind of. it was funny enough, but i doubt the younger kids will understand most of the puns and references to pop culture.

landslide of ogre babies, merlin with no pants, superhero/sidekick princesses...

what more can i say?

there is no mathematics to love and lost

i have waited for this day for such a long time, and it finally arrived. anberlin came into town and brought copeland with them.

the night opened up with angela's dish. i distinctively heard someone in the crowd hopeful that they will start off slow and ease into it but no. the explosion of noise nearly burst my eardrums. that was also partly because the speakers were right on top of me. they were alright for a local band.

copeland then opened with a soft piece which was a nice change. frontman aaron marsh had a unique way of expressing himself when playing the keys. to be honest, i enjoyed the songs where he played keys to more than the others. towards the end of their set, some people began chanting for anberlin to come on. but it would have been nice if they'd play a few more songs off their new album.

the atmosphere radically changed as anberlin stepped onto the stage. electrified energy burst out of the speakers as the band started their first song. as usual, i was bracing myself against the barrier as the crowd surged forward. just like them i sang along to every single song. anberlin played their first acoustic set in melbourne (second if you count the underage gig that afternoon) and it was great. i hung out for 'a whisper and a clamour' and i got it! just as quickly as they came on, the got off and the night was over.

all the band members did stay after the show to chat but i wish i had enough time to ask him my questions. there are things that intrigued me about him and i would have liked to find out where he was coming from. well, there's always email. and the next time they come. i was surprised to see nick from antiskeptic there as well so i said hi.

for more photos of the night, go here.

pirates of the caribbean: at world's end

"nobody move! i dropped me brain!"

after almost three hours of sitting on plush chairs, that was what i could come up with. whilst some scenes were engaging and encouraged suspense (namely the action scenes), others were purely dragging. granted, without those scenes, we wouln't be able to make head or tail of what was happening or why there was a giant woman standing on the black pearl.

with betrayal being a main part of the story, there were too much of a labyrinth of plots and sometimes, it was quite hard to figure out who was betraying whom. the sheer number of main characters also added to the confusion.

however, pirates 3 did answer a lot of the questions raised in the first two movies, a perfect end to the trilogy. it did tie up beautifully(despite the long sequence), although i did detest sitting through the entire credits for the last remaining scene. that's what the fast forward button on the dvd is for.

hot date

it's rare to have time to spend with my cousin and even rarer to have the both of us sitting in my room in total silence; comfortable silence. granted, we didn't spend all that time in total silence with me and my photos and her with a cosmo mag. true to being girls we looked at photos and raided my wardrobe. she got away with a dress for herself and a newish school bag for her brother.

we talked too. from boys to...actually mostly just about boys. i wondered, how did she get so wise? it wasn't too long ago that she was anti-God/church/parents. i do marvel at the change God brought into her life. i sincerely pray that she will continue to seek God in everything.

you know when you are getting older...

...when your body takes longer than a day to recover from lack of sleep.

yesterday, i had a three hour exercise demonstration class by lisa westlake. it was quite interesting to hear her talk about her experience of aerobics in the eighties when it first started out, how it has progressed over the years to doing bumwalks to more specialised routines, les mills and leotards reminiscent of aerobics instructors from the eighties. she also went through the principles of teaching an exercise class in theory as well as practice. all interesting stuff. by the end of it, the whole class of fourth years were sweating like pigs in the sauna; as was i.

this whole thing made me realise how much i dislike talking let alone teaching to a whole bunch of people from the stage. there are so many things you have to think about when you're a physio teaching an exercise class! motivation, making sure there are options for those who aren't that fit or incapable of learning certain steps or keeping to the beat.

probably not where i want to end up doing, but knowing all these should be good for me...

the world is crushing
i need to get away
wanting is one thing
experience is different
total desintergration of expectations

08.05.07

spiderman 3

spiderman 3 was a little disappointing for a three billion budgeted film. granted, the choreographed action scenes were good but what's with peter parker's fingerpointing at girls whilst strolling down the street? don't get me wrong, it was entertaining; a bit of comedy here, some action there, explosions.

i liked the darker look of peter parker. the emo hair, the dark clothes, the dance at the jazz bar (maybe a bit of the black eye makeup). but that's not what spiderman is about, is it?

everyone has a darker side and what we do with it is the choice we have to make. even when we fall, there is a chance of redemption, and to make things right. peter tries to make restitution by separating eddie brock from the symbiote but the 'being bad makes me happy' brock is reluctant to part with it. cain marko aka sandman sought forgiveness and showed his remorse over ben parker's death even if it was an accident.

little plastic soldiers

how do you guard your heart? realistically practically speaking. seek God, wait on Him, take things slow, phase of your life. studies, career, exams. ask your father. and advice. what to do when he does this. or that. or both. oohs, ahhs, hmms. sus him out. do you have a go between? when are you seeing him? did you have a good time? what did you do? what did HE do?

hey, all these doesn't help. seriously. you think you may be helping but you're not. somethings i need to figure out for myself and i'm really grateful for your listening. i'm grateful that you're taking interest in my life. i rant, i rave but...

thanks beautiful, for your challenging questions. thanks for keeping me accountable.

april showers

fear and trepidation
a different room
privilege and excitement
something new

blackjack and paperclips
shopping for film
candles and polish
dancing on the inside

dreams and revelations
sunrise tomorrow
inears and cases
when is sunset?

30.04.07

he doesn't like me! well, not in THAT way.

oh, thank God.

300

i went to see 300 this weekend and it was good. if you liked sin city, you'll definitely like this. it's a movie adaptaion of a comic by frank miller, inspired by the battle of thermopylae in 480bc. king leonidas did in fact have three hundred spartans as well as thespian volunteers that led a small resistance that turned the tide of war between the greeks and persians.

what i like about the movie is the quality of the cgi done. camera angles were great where it zoomed in and slowed down to show the carnage and ferocity of the soldiers, the raw emotion of loss and the rage. gerard butler did his character justice. his commanding air as the king commanded also the audience's attention as he shouts encouragements to his troops and barks orders in the midst of battle.

there are many arguments about the ideology and the historical content of the film where it's 'east vs west', may have political undertones and the portrayal of persians as a coloured, bloodthirsty, deformed and deviant group. as critics scream racism, bear in mind that although it was based on history, this is a work of fiction and should be taken as such.

congratulations to phanin and julz on tying the knot!

last weekend, i had the privilege of witnessing the union of phanin and juliet. finally! there was such a relaxed air during the ceremony and everyone had fun, including the bride and especially the groom. he had the biggest grin from when julz walked into the chapel, all through the reception.

he stuffed up his vows, had a little bit of trouble with the veil and sang her a song he composed himself.

she just looked beautiful.

and me? well, i had sore feet from all the dancing and i dropped my contact lens down the sink in the only time when i forgot to put the stopper in. sigh.

yesterday i was in the emergency department of royal melbourne hospital. it was quite big and the nursing area did look kind of look like the reception area in ER. except ER was so much cooler. still, physio being a primary contact practitioner is cool and we played with plaster after an unusually quiet afternoon. i pretended i had a wrist fracture and had my right arm wrapped up in plaster of Paris for ten minutes. then, my supervisor cut it off. it was quite scary but the blades don't cut as they vibrate rather than spin. then a friend of mine had both his arms plastered so we got some practice. it was a fun first day in ED being a physio, rather than a patient.

for those who don't know, the cool scar on my forehead didn't appear overnight. i actually fainted while on placement in first year, hit the corner of the table and scared the hell out of the patient i was observing. i woke up a few minutes later with a massive headache and a voice calling my name in a thick scottish accent. weird thing was, i had a chat earlier that day with a friend and we were talking about how it would be like to be wheeled in a gurney and watch the lights go past. i actually was wheeled to the emergency room. AND had ecg leads stuck to me. then three stitches put in by a very hot intern with a chinese last name. he didn't look asian at all.

this morning, i had a construction worker yell out a good morning to me from across the street as i waited for the bus. that was after he nearly ran me over as i crossed the street with his huge trailer.

over the weekend

i attempted to clean my room

i retrashed my room looking for my flash drive

i listened to cities by anberlin

i did no work

i attended a hen's lunch which was by far the highlight of my entire weekend.

brush with a cynosure

i had my first morning in the neurosurgery ward, treating littlies and notso little kids. and guess who i met this morning?





michael klim!






i watched him walk down the hallway thinking he has michael klim's head. and it was!! i was so distracted for the rest of the morning, trying to see if he walked passed and not really paying attention to my supervisor as she tried to explain the patient to me. i don't mean to sound absolutely smitten, but it's not everyday that a celebrity stands less than six inches way from you for five full minutes without being swamped by people getting his autograph.

i went to the beach last night

i was in my white polo with the blue 'university of melbourne physiotherapy' embroidery and my black pants. i was wearing white socks and black shoes. the air was warm enough not to need a jacket but cool enough not to need one. the sun was high in the sky.

i took my shoes and socks off so my toes can play with the sand. thongs littered the platform before the steps. i left my shoes amongst the multicoloured rubber soles. after a few steps, i became annoyed at how the hems of my pants collected the fine sand so i rolled them up. and my sleeves. i didn't want shirt tanlines. then cursed that i didn't bring my bathers and considered swimming in my undies.

what the hell does this all mean?

am i struggling with my school life and my social life?

am i living with them too close together?

or too far apart?

am i so different like the black shoes among the multitude of coloured thongs?

or am i trying too hard?

on the day of valentine...

... i was given chocolate by a nurse,
a greasy by a registrar,
and love from a 75 year old man.

be my muse

last night, i had the absolute pleasure of being tossed around at a muse gig. pleasure, you ask? well, it's just a polite word for the #@! i felt while constricted (and breathless) between people a head and more taller than me. when everyone started to jump, i found that with no effort at all, i was hurled into the air and only to crash back down again with the rhythm the masses set. as i was progressively pushed backwards by the tall and aggressive moshers, i resigned to the fact that i, like most asians, am short and therefore need to smuggle a stool in next time i go for a gig or wear really high platforms; both, quite inconvenient. either that or just growing taller.

considering the fact that i couldn't see anything, it was quite good. the visual displays complemented the musical highs and lows. their encore set was quite long and they did play knights of cydonia, one that i was looking forward to hearing live.

i think this is band that i'll see once and probably never see live again. it's too much money and i'm really lucky to get the ticket for $50 instead of the $80odd price. i did observe my self imposed limit after all!

my only regret is not being right up the front, thanks to some people who wanted to get a drink beforehand.

i don't know how to put this into words...

the five weeks away from everyone that really knew me did give me some time to myself, time to think things through. i don't think i've resolved any of them but it made me realise how much more i don't know about so many things.

i've gone from knowing what i think i want to sitting on an island in the middle of nowhere. i'm searching for a way to get back to civilisation but there doesn't seem to be any. sure there are people around but they don't know how to get off the island either.

i think it's because i feel alone that i go out whenever i can, living up the life as they call it but that empty feeling, that loneliness, is still there when it all ends. no, i don't crave attention...well, maybe just a bit. everything seems so far way. sometimes, i don't even know how to describe how i'm feeling on the inside.

i have this thing where what i feel on the inside reflects on the outside. but there's a line. how does one be polite when there's a fury raging on the inside or heartwrenching grief over nothing? i don't want to pretend i have it all and present an exterior of calm and collectedness when i don't have it all together and what i'm feeling is on the other extreme.

life is never meant to be easy, i know that; but why does it have to be so damn hard?

she feel fake
like a smile plastered on a clown's face,
she is fake
under the guise of order
chaos rules her heart
to the casual eye,
she has it all
the perceptible authenticity they see
the apparent superficiality she feels
her heart desires for more
but all she sees is inner entropy

14.01.07

she stared up at the wall in front of her. the height is endless. the situation she was in was horrible. what made me jump into this hole, she asked. i couldn't have been that stupid to do that it myself. the prospects of living in there wasn't good. pretty soon, she'll die of not just thirst and hunger but loneliness. the only way out was to climb the impossible wall in front of her.

after a few moments of indecision, she made her first foothold and dug her foot in it. slowly she made her way up and out of the pit. there were moments where she stopped and wanted to give up but the climb down was just as hard as the climb up to where she was.

suddenly fear gripped her. what if she were to fall? who would catch her; especially from that height. it was hours before she was able to summon enough courage to take the next step up the wall. along the way, there were branches to hold on to to rest, pools of water to quench her thirst, but she still moves on.

she is still climbing that wall today. her reserves are nearly finished but she can see the speck of light in the distance; smaller than the end of a needle.

as she climbs, she wonders what that light holds for her.

out of my entire trip to kuala lumpur and singapore, i only got to met up with friends three times. the rest was occupied with catching up with my extended family, or hanging around dan because i have nothing else to do. i think it's because i probably won't be able to see them for a while with all the travelling i'm planning to do once i get my funds. i'm glad i did catch up with those friends. i met two of my oldschool friends i haven't seen in seven or so years and it was great listening to them interact like back in the old days. it's like i never left.

but despite my five week holiday, i'm glad i am home now. not so happy with the near 40 degree heat. more so the company and the friends i've made since i arrived. i do miss the new friends i made and i do hope we keep in contact (some more than others).

many people have asked me about resolutions and i have made it a point not to make any. but it is always good to make goals in life and a friend once asked me what i wanted to achieve before i was twentyfive. so here it are ten of them, not in order (some of which i have already done):

[list deleted, 29.05.07]

the last one is hard to predict and situations can't be controlled so we'll see how i go.

i'm going home tomorrow! i'm excited because i will get to sleep in my bed after five weeks of strange hard beds and overtly soft beds, eating out, packed days and showers past midnight. in the five weeks of being away, i have had only three homecooked meals. three! that is poor.

i will summarise my last week or so when i'm back in melbourne with a reliable internet connection. it's pretty hard to upload pictures when thenet connection keeps being cut off on top of being at dialup speeds.

the tale of timing and directions

my first few minutes of 2007 was spent alone, crammed in between sweaty people in the esplanade in singapore, trying to watch half of the fireworks that are not obstructed by this big building standing right in front of us.

stuff it, i thought and decided to go home; only to walk out into the nearly empty street to have a clear view of the fireworks. to be honest they weren't great. they didn't even make it to the 'good' level.

i was supposed to meet some friends at a bar but they ended up late. dan and i missed each other at the station so dan missed the fireworks, treated himself to a drink and went home. i did end up catching up with the above mentioned friends but that was after i got lost trying to find the mrt station and had to call someone because the people i did ask for directions told me to 'follow the crowd'. the problem was, that the crowd was moving in five different directions.

dan, on the otherhand, arrived safely home to discover that no one answered the door when he rang the doorbell. he went down to sit on a bench outside and came back up only to miss me by 15 minutes. by that time, i had already crashed into my bed and closed the door.

i was quite worried that he had not come home and tried to call him a few times but i couldn't get through so i decided to sleep. the funny thing was, my aunt & uncle's room door was open so they could hear the doorbell (my aunt is a very light sleeper) but for some reason, they didn't. so dan spent the night outside the front door til six in the morning. the maid eventually let him in.

all up, this was the crappiest start to the new year and i really do hope that the rest of the year isn't like the start.