i guess i'd better explain myself.

i was doing pretty well for my supplementary clinical work and i was expected to finish early. then i got a call from the deputy head of school on friday, just before i left for home from work.

'you need to come in to talk to me on monday. you didn't do so well in your exams.'

then my weekend was gone. i had a mask on as i went through my weekend but inside, i felt low, depressed, dazed. people close to me probably noticed i wasn't really there when i talked to them or there was something different about me. a few did ask, but i didn't tell them.

so i went in on monday, knowing but fearful of what we were going to talk about. 'the progress committee decided it would be better for you if you repeated third year.'

my tear ducts worked overtime these few days. i'm surprised that there was still more to flow. i cried on monday, tuesday and wednesday. and i'm still coming to terms with these feelings i have and the future of having to go through the entire year. then there's the issue of changing clinical schools. so many things to think about.

so now you know.